Published by Harper Collins on May 19th 2015
Genres: Young Adult, Contemporary, Romance
Reality, it turns out, is often not what you perceive it to be—sometimes, there really is someone out to get you. For fans of Silver Linings Playbook and Liar, this thought-provoking debut tells the story of Alex, a high school senior—and the ultimate unreliable narrator—unable to tell the difference between real life and delusion.
Alex fights a daily battle to figure out what is real and what is not. Armed with a take-no-prisoners attitude, her camera, a Magic 8 Ball, and her only ally (her little sister), Alex wages a war against her schizophrenia, determined to stay sane long enough to get into college. She's pretty optimistic about her chances until she runs into Miles. Didn't she imagine him? Before she knows it, Alex is making friends, going to parties, falling in love, and experiencing all the usual rites of passage for teenagers. But Alex is used to being crazy. She's not prepared for normal. Can she trust herself? Can we trust her?
I received this book for free from Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.
This book, oh my God, my heart.
I have a confession to make. I did not read the blurb before reading this book, because it was an e-book, and I was too lazy to go into Goodreads to check out the blurb. So I dived into this book without knowing what was going on, and guys, this hurts my heart a million times more. If I had read the blurb, I would have known to prepare tissues, hehe.
But guys, this book is freaking beautiful.
This is a story about a girl, who tried so hard to know what is real, and what is hallucination, and we get to go through this journey this her. To be honest, I have zero knowledge about schizophrenia. I mean, I have heard of it, but was never really interested in knowing more about it. So, yes, I was one of those ignorant people, I am so sorry.
But this book really opened up my eyes, and made me see what schizophrenia really was about. And I have a new appreciation for people who are diagnosed with it, because man, they are strong people. Reading through Alex’s perspective really broke my heart. She had a really hard time figuring out what was real and what was not, and going through that with her…… Sigh. Alex was amazing. Like, really AMAZING. She was probably one of my favorite main characters. I definitely enjoyed her side of the story, experiencing her hallucinations.
FEELS, GUYS. FEELS.
Alex was funny. She was everything I wanted to be. Funny as hell, a history buff, and she’s smart. Her illness doesn’t really faze her. She goes through life one step at a time, and by the end of the book, I was cheering for her. Not to overcome her illness, but to win through her illness. To control it, instead of it controlling her. There was definitely more to Alex than just her mental illness. She wasn’t one of those people who would cry and complain about their illness 24/7 to get. No, Alex was freaking strong, and I love her.
Miles was… Miles was complicated. It took me a long while to figure him out. And I like what I figured out. Miles was the top character in this book who went through a hella change. And knowing what he went through, he was still there for Alex, despite her hallucinations. Miles was, like I said, a complication. He was evil, bad, mean and just plain heartbreaking. He protects himself so deeply, so that nobody could ever hurt him. And seeing him letting Alex get close to him? MY HEART. Figuring out Miles was like solving that puzzle. Everything falls into place, and slowly by slowly as you’re piecing the puzzle together, you fell in love with him.
This whole book was beautiful and tragic and feels just kept pouring out of it.
“But – but what if this whole place” — I had to suck in air again — “what if everything is inside my head? East Shoal and Scarlet and this bridge and you — what if you’re not real because nothing is real?”
“if nothing’s real, then what does it matter?” he said. “You live here. Doesn’t that make it real enough?”
ADSDFDDSGKJHSJHGSJDFKB. LOVE LOVE THIS BOOK.